Lovely Por Vida

I suck. I've totally been slacking. From now on I'm going to try to write at least once a week, or at least a month rather. I need to find some sort of comfort for all my repressed neurosis. Obviously shopping is out of the question because of the lack of abundance on this island.

It's been hectic. Work, school, housewife - all full time. So at the end of pretty much everyday, I feel exactly the way people describe the morning after being slipped a roofie... minus the anal pain. Spring break wasn't much of a break either, I still had to work. Besides the fact that I can get weekly facials and buy more vodka for the weekends, the only reason why I felt the need to work so much is because somehow my husband's hungry ex-wife upped the amouunt of monthly child support. Between that and a lawyer that charges $250 an hour and my firstborn, we're almost about elbow deep in ass in bills. Also, my husband and I finally moved out of his parents' house. So if there is any extra time left, I'd be unpacking and organizing.

Our new apartment is pretty chill. One of the very few things I like about living in Guam is the ghetto and hassle-free contracts and cheap rent. So although my expectations and standards are extremely high, I was willing to settle for a little less than the creme de la creme. On another note, moving out of that house was the best decision we've made since deciding not to get a glass eyeball installed for fun. I mean, by the last week I was willing to pack our shit and move down to the corner of "Depressing" and "West Shit Street". There was just way too much unnecessary and petty drama. (Please. I'm not even going to get into that. All I have to say about that is, no drama is worth talking about if the effort to get on my level wasn't even considered. Such a fucking waste of time.)

Up until a few days ago, I just felt exhausted. Although the benefits of freedom and drama free life outweighed the burden of staying in someone else's home for all these months and not being able to use our own shit and walk around the house in my underwear, I was so disgusted and bored with myself because I always ended asking myself, "What the fuck am I doing here?" I miss my friends, family, and starbucks. I miss dry weather, spinning and yoga classes. I miss countless hours of shopping and lunching with martinis with my girls. I miss going to barbeques and parties without being the only one in a dress or makeup. So I was totally ready to throw myself out our second-story window. They say you don't know what you have until its gone. Now I know. On the bright side though, between all that and taking my rottie to the dog park (aka "gnarly burn up and down my ass and thighs" hill) for two hours every night and going meatless for two months really paid off. My hipbones are now razor sharp.

Anyway, I really need to pipe down and stop being such a pussy because thanks to my ability to get what I want when I want, I was bale to sweet talk my husband into moving back to California. In the midst of selling all our household goods, I was sad to see our Tempurpedic go. I got to charge an extra 200 for it along with the bedroom set, about a tenth of what it's worth. I guess our Pottery Barn sheets feels and looks just as up to par on our new air mattress. After all, who wouldn't trade in a Tempurpedic for a $30 air mattress from the Navy Exchange? My life totally sucks.

On a better note, I had a pleasant phone conversation with my father yesterday. He being a successful business man himself, lended some informative insight on a business proposition my husband and I came up with. He was delighted with the idea and agreed to fund half of the business once we got to California and finish our drafted business plan. My husband swears up and down that he would make it work. I believe him. He is already a well known executive chef on this island and even in the Coast Guard. He graduated from Johnson & Wales, which is the second best ranking culinary institute in America. He's also well educated and helped me understsand the art and concept of fine cooking (wow, congratulations to me for always being able to shift the conversation into being about me). So if anything, he's be the one person in the world to not confuse enthusiasm for passion. That's why I love him so much. My little chunky monkey.

That being said, school for me will have to come to a halt again because I would not want to miss this opportunity for anything. Yes, I'm going to have to haul ass and finish up what few units I have left and that thesis tout de suite afterwards if I want to tackle that degree by the age of 27. (That's my scary age). Being a military wife didn't help much either. Shit, but I figured my husband has eight years on me, so why the hell not? Let's grant his shit first. I could've sweet talked my father into funding the whole 180, then we wouldn't have to work twice as hard. But besides the fact that I wanted to be with my husband, I moved out here with him to not only prove a fact to my parents, but I don't want to be a spoiled asshole. Some of you may say, it defeats the purpose if my dad's even remotely involved, especially financially. But it's definitely a start. We're talking about parents who bought their daughter her first Louis Vuitton baguette at the age of eight and her first brand new car of her choice at the age of sixteen for accomplishing... nothing! Not even a permit, let alone a driver's license.

That's it for now kids. My mother is blowing up my phone because she wants me to join a hiphop class with her at her gym once I get back to the states. She was obviously born without the embarrassment gene.

Ciao. C<3 

Hola lovers.

I thought I'd give in this whole Vox craze. I figured some of the best blogs are all on here, so why the hell not? Though I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing, I think I'll probably get the hang of it soon. Most of my friends and family are either on MySpace or Facebook, so I'm going to just start randomly added people who look promising into my neighborhood. Don't even ask me if I know what the hell that is. So please let me know if I'm doing something wrong or simply just fucking up. Thanks.

Today is a very special day for me because it's the first holiday after my husband and I decided to make shit really work after the big "D" word. By this day, I thought I'd be congratulating him for graduating from bottom-feeder to cocksucker. Huh, how things change, hm? Not only is this the perfect day to belittle all our single friends, but of course it's my way of expressing how glad I am for him to recognize how terrible his life would be without me. I'm pleased that he finally came to his senses.

Today's a work day for him so surprisingly, I actually have time to blog about one of my favorite holidays. I always figured people who hated Valentine's Day were all loser (no offense) and Negative Nancies who always wanted to savagely assault happy couples, but in actuality, its a perfect night for singles to troll the city for undatable alcoholics. Hey, gotta look on the bright side is all I'm saying.

I wanted to go to the movies to watch Confessions of a Shopaholic or one of the other chick flicks, but decided it was a bad idea because we couldn't be inappropriate without getting a few "ahems" or weird looks. So yesterday, we actually went out and rented some movies for the big night: Mamma Mia, My Best Friend's Girl, Lakeview Terrace, and Mirrors. A scary flick. Ha, slick. Then we went to pick up a few things at the commissary so I can make my red velvet cupcakes with meringue icing and loaded oatmeal cookies. Not very festive the oatmeal part, but bitch was craving.

Okay, so someone pulled their tard-card out a bit too early this morning because I was very upset and crankier than usual because of the fact that my husband had to work this morning. He totally make it up to me because when I had awoken to the usual empty space next to me on the Tempurpedic, this is what I found:

Someone's breaking out the special lube tonight...

Isn't that the sweetest and most thoughtful thing you've ever seen? I never told him about the new Hello Kitty M.A.C. line that I was obsessing to my girlfriend over on the phone a week ago because I didn't want to stick my hand in our savings again. So this was more of a surprise for me because I didn't even tell him. So I thought I'd break out the red Victoria's Secret apron lingerie. (That, being of course, in our bedroom... hence we're staying at my mother-in-law's house. That just wouldn't be kosher.) Ha, so this Valentine's Day, prepare to endure even more PDA from me than usual. Wow, this blog is pretty much me saying to the world, "I'm in love and not afraid to annoy the shit out of everyone."

*Big kiss*

Anyway, here are a few random ramblings for today, hence the long week. Enjoy=]

Drum roll please...♥

*I eat fast food at least once a week.

*I'm extremely organized and I get irritated easily when there's clutter around me. Or someone else clutters my organization.

*I live for happy hour.

*I'm super duper self conscious but very few people know just HOW self conscious I am. Because I'm a spectacular actress.

*I was the reason why there was a dress code.

*My standards are extremely high. Now, I'm not saying that just because... whatever reason girls say them. But I set high standards for myself beacuse I don't believe in just settling for what I have and has-beens. I strive for the best and perfection daily and not an ounce less.

*I fall for guys who are funny and sarcastic. Or funny because they're sarcastic. The kind of guy women tend to think are mean, a dick, or a meathead. They're just misunderstood. Kind of a like a man version... of me.

*I love animals. You can probably get me to do anything if there are animals involved, especially helping them. It's my Achilles heel.

*I always have my toes done. Though I don't get my nails done as much anymore because I no longer believe in acrylics (I haven't since '99 and so should have ever other lady out there), you will never see them naked. Not too sure if that's healthy, but gotta be good and did 24/7!

*I love hiking. That's one of the things I totally miss about being in California. The Skyline Hills and horse trail is only about 10 minutes from my mother's house and that's where all the good air is at 6 in the morning.

*I've come to realize that I really REALLY hate it when people I'm not 100% comfortable with poke or pinch me. Like are you fucking serious? I barely let my husband youch me, let alone some creepy weirdo.

*I am excellent with directions. My mother has a great sense of direction, so that's where I may have gotten it.

*I'm planning on getting Invisalign by the end of this year. No, I wasn't fortunately blessed with naturally gorgeous straight teeth and was too cool to get braces when I was younger. Though it's funny because my father mentioned that I say that I was too cool when I was younger, yet I'm getting the invisible ones now. So now I'm paying fot it... literally. Our insurance considers Invisalign a "cosmetic option" and I consider them "full of shit".

*I tend to have more moods than a depressed, bi-polar, meth addict, with ADD on random ass days rahter than that time of the month. Besides the occasional cramps (which is rarely), I feel nothing when Aunt Flow is in town. Just another day in the life of Princess Obsessive.

I don't have issues, I have the whole fucking subscription.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone and I hope you enjoy every minute of it. And for everyone else... I guess you can be grateful that Valentine's is on a Saturday so you don't have to watch everyone's flowers being delivered at work.
I tried. =]